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    January 27

    写在新年伊始之晨

    新年之际,我像个孩子一样很激动,以至于久久无法入睡。起身,喝水,一直喝到胃有些隐隐作痛。脑海里不停地闪现着画面,黑的,白的,白的,黑的,翻过来倒过去,没有头绪,没有尽头。新的一年,我该站在哪里,做些什么?或者说在过去的一年里,本命年的多舛即将结束时,我有获得新生的权利了吗?

     

    说是金融危机,在这除夕之夜,在融融炮竹声中,和电视里还在播放的如何应对经济危机话题似乎格格不入。呵呵,其实这个世界,到处都是矛盾的结合体,就比如简单的生活,不可强求,或是纠结的日子,无从体会都是一个理。矛盾如此之多,有时候人如果能够学会逃避,那肯定是善待自己的做法,如果不会逃避,那就只有被虐待,狠狠地被虐待,直到自己学会逃避,或着,放弃。也许到头来才发现其实没有什么绝对的逃避和面对,只不过缘分如此,原则如此,更何况唐僧的九九八十一难还是佛祖内定的呢。

     

    有人会问,按这么推理,那人活着又有什么意义。人如果真的要追究为何而活的话,那可能比到底是鸡生蛋,还是蛋生鸡的问题更加令人痛苦。所以在此刻,在喝了很多白开水后,我开始醒悟,其实人,只是,因为渴而要喝水,因为害怕死亡而活着,当然想要自杀的人另当别论。柯南说真相只有一个,确实如此,但是知道真相又能如何,悲剧已经发生,难道真的能起死回生吗?这显然是不可能的,唯一能做的是防患于未然。也许只有这样,我们才能安稳地活着,包括,在口渴的时候心安理得地喝水,不用怀疑是否被人下毒。

     

    最后想用一句米兰昆德拉的话来结束自己的荒诞言论:人们回忆起的过去没有时间。不可能像重读一本书或着看一部电影一样去重温爱情。

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